Had a wonderful time last night with my co-workers celebrating Christmas with dinner and an exchange of gifts. We were short one person due to a family emergency. My heart was with her most of the evening, but we still managed to enjoy ourselves. We spoke of doing it more often.
Life at times seems to throw you curve balls which you simply do not know how to dodge. I have my faith and I know God is in control, but as a mere mortal, we constantly try to figure out what to do a ... how can we fix it ... how can we resolve the issue ... is our course of action best! I know that I know God has my back. I continually cast my cares knowing He is working it all out for my good, but! Well, you know where that 'but' leads ... straight to worry and frustration. One second I am telling myself, "Janet, you know God has this. You know He has a purpose for it all. You know you just have to take one day at a time, and see where He leads". On the other hand, my mind is saying, "This is what you need to do!" It is a forever battle within. Ultimately I will leave it where it should be ... in His hands ... but I think the 'not knowing how this will turn out' is something we deal with every time we have situations in our lives. I will continue to pray ... strive so desperately to keep my mouth shut and not react ... knowing all things work for the good for those who love Him, which I most definitely do!
Christmas is getting closer and I am getting excited. Nothing does the heart better than to watch your loved ones open their presents. Watching the joy and surprise on their faces is priceless. This kind of happiness cannot be purchased or boxed. It is pure adrenaline for me. Then, on Saturday, I am having my family dinner! Family ... it truly is what it is all about!
My son is at his daddy's until Sunday. My life certainly is different when he is not around. Different good or different bad? I think a combination of both. I find myself at times with such a void in my heart, and then at other times I enjoy the added time where I can focus on my desires. I enjoy watching him grow into the young man God is molding him to be. He has always been such a blessing to me, as are both my children and grandchildren. My heart simply is overwhelmed with joy and love at just the thought of them!
Ok, Peeps, I am going to try to go get some more shut eye! I pray you have a truly blessed day ... walk in faith knowing He has you in the palm of his hands!